Changes Are For The Better

It has been nearly two months now, and I must say, I am excited with these changes. Things are beginning to look positive. Everyone is happy. There is not a day that passes by, that whenever I call, she’s not there. These days, she would always be there to pick up my calls. Be it at the house, at the shops, or in the car. I am ecstatic with these changes. And I know for sure that I am not the only one.

It all happened two months ago. If it hadn’t been for that particular incident, I don’t think she would have noticed it. So I guess the incident was actually a blessing in disguise. The fact that someone else in the group stood up for her and took pity on her must have made her realized that things are not what it seems. That all those people were taking her for a ride, taking advantage of her kindness. Something that I have been tolerating for years up till the point that I couldn’t take it anymore that I felt like doing something out of the ordinary. Luckily I haven’t gone through with the extreme.

Allah is just so wonderful, so I guess our prayers have been answered. But I don’t want to be happy with it just as yet. I have to make sure that whatever that took place does not continue or happen again in the future. Things are very sensitive at the moment and I don’t want to jeopardize that. For a start, this is good. So I think I have to steer this into a more positive direction so that she is taken away, and as far as possible with those things which happened in the past. For a start, cut off all contacts with those people who I dislike. Then, indulge her with excessive love and remind her that whatever it is, we are there for her; mentally, physically and financially, if need be.

She is also undergoing several changes as well. Gone are the days where her concerns were only related to that thing. These days, her love and care are showered to everyone surrounding her. In other words, we come first before that whatever thing that she was involved with. Her attention span has expanded even bigger and I know fore sure that everyone loves her for that. Her relationship with a certain someone has also improved tremendously. And I myself couldn’t be happier. It’s just so wonderful.

But these changes are considered still at the very early stage. There’s no knowing if things may go back to square one, something which I hope will never happen. It is kind of scary even when just thinking about it. So I guess, we need to find ways to circumvent that. But for now, we’ll just enjoy this. It’s been a while, and I think everyone’s tired and deserve a break.

Let there be HOPE, Insya Allah…

Update

I haven’t been updating the blog for quite a while now. My intention to update once a week has somehow failed. Well, I can’t really blame myself (or should I?) coz things have been moving at a fast pace lately, and I am just enjoying the ride.

Last two weekends, I went to Johor for a conference. Three days and two nights. I stayed at Sofitel. It was a nice hotel. I liked it. Most of the participants were male. So you can imagine just how many males there were, old and young, at the conference. Some are nice, some are, hhmm.. how should I put this, EXTRA nice. Since this conference is considered as part of work, of course these married male participants felt like they were single throughout the 3-day conference, since their wives and kids weren’t around. And yes, I had few men trying to be up close and personal with me, inviting me for karaoke sessions, or just sitting next to me for dinner, or standing next to me during the refreshment breaks. I didn’t mind if they were young (being a bit choosy, aren’t we.. hehehe) but they were in their forties, with bald heads (well one of them) and looking at me from top to bottom with looks that made me want to puke in my mouth.

Since one of them happened to be one of the bosses here, of course he knew that I am married with kids. But man, the way he looked at me when I stepped down for dinner that night, gave me the creeps and these days, I am quite cautious of him. I don’t think I was overly dressed. I was wearing a sleeveless (not one of those tank tops, ok) that was like a turtleneck except that it has no sleeves (type of shirt you usually wear inside your jacket) and a shawl on my shoulder. The next day, I wore a black skirt and top, with a red scarf and a pair of boots (hehehe.. I know.. a pair of leather boots. I couldn’t help buying it. It was so cheap. 50 percent discount from the original price and it’s a Nine West). I don’t know if that sparked any interest. But I guess it did. Even a younger male participant (married though with four children) couldn’t help but stick around me for most of the time. But I could tolerate him. I guess it was the age factor that made me felt alright with it. At least I didn’t feel like puking.

But you know what? Despite the looks I got from them, and the ‘innocent’ invitations from them to hang out, I felt great. It boosted my confidence level knowing that I am still marketable. Hehehehe… bad isn’t it? But I couldn’t help it. I felt pretty and young, despite the fact that I have two kids. And of course I enjoyed the attention given. Who wouldn’t?

Bie and the kids did come down coz I couldn’t leave my baby behind. He is still breastfeeding. I told Bie about those men, and Bie (being his usual macho self) wasn’t angry a bit. In fact, he found it rather funny. He actually laughed. Funny isn’t it? But I had fun with the kids there during the night. The bed was huge so my kids had fun rolling themselves and jumping on top of the bed. The looks on their faces were priceless. Mental note: Must take them for a holiday.. and soon. Insya Allah.

Of course I had dinner with Bie. We went to Persada Johor coz my mom-in-law’s good friend; well her daughter that is, is working as a chef there. And we had briyani gam (which tasted better than the hotel food). And we also enjoyed the performance by the string quartet, which was imported all the way from Indonesia. All in all, it was good.

Now that’s on the conference. On the job offer; I am supposed to give a response soon right, and I was also expecting a bonus and an increment. But today, when I got the salary slip, I was disappointed to see that there was no increment and no bonus just as yet. I’m supposed to call that company up but my bonus isn’t in yet. So how can I compare and contrast?

Furthermore, a few days ago, my boss called me into his room. He asked me to update him some of my personal data. I was a little surprised. Why would he want that? I knew that I wasn’t due for any promotion (he made it clear earlier this year). And imagine my happiness when he told me that he was recommending me for a salary adjustment. Not much though, but considering that my responsibilities and job scope wouldn’t be affected, I welcome an increase in salary anytime, anywhere. So yes, I am waiting for that. Looks like I have to put hold the offer first until I see this so-called salary adjustment quantum, and of course my bonus payout.

Hhmm.. oh yes, we’re having a Group sports carnival soon. And guess what? I will be playing futsal for the company. The women’s team. At first I didn’t want to join because I just didn’t feel like it. I have never played futsal in my whole entire life, so I wasn’t about to start. But my homies were playing and they told me that they didn’t have any proper training. Unfortunately the guys’ team weren’t helping much in terms of coaching and training. And a colleague of mine (a guy) was constantly asking me to join the team. So I proposed to them to allow Bie to be the coach for the women’s team, and if Beckham is there, of course Posh too has to be there. Hehehehe.. so yeah, I am now officially a member of the team. We’ve only practiced twice, but I had fun on both occasions. Surprisingly, I could kick a ball or two. So after this, I think I’ll be watching Gol & Gincu.. for inspiration purposes. Hehehe..

That’s a lot up update isn’t it? The last update before I blog off; I am having a sleepover at Putrajaya tonight at Pah’s house. There’ll be about seven of us. At first we wanted to have a picnic, but in view of a possible rain, we thought we’d buy biryani rice (again) and eat it at Pah’s. It has always been fun hanging out with the Gurls. And I especially look forward to this particular gathering.

Have a nice weekend everyone!

Got An Offer

I went to an interview a few weeks back at this business consultancy firm somewhere in Tower 2 at KLCC. I wasn’t really looking for a new job, but I felt like testing the market. After all, I have been here at this company of mine for nearly seven years now. I don’t want to be too complacent. I didn’t even send out a lot of CVs. In fact, all I did was click on Jobstreet, about eight of them I think, and therefore I was quite surprised when they called me for an interview. But I was happy. At least I’m still marketable.

I went to the interview with no expectations at all. After all, I have never heard of the firm before. Furthermore, I am currently employed at a GLC and no doubt the pay isn’t as exciting, but the recent revised benefits are something that I should ponder on, if I decide to leave.

The establishment wasn’t that fantastic. I mean the office set-up. It looked pretty small and the reception area was very small. The posters hanging on the wall didn’t really entice me much. The firm was previously focused on IT-related services. So most of the information that can be seen were related to IT, networking, and others which are totally something that I am not in touch with. The fact that they made me wait for an hour and a half was another factor which made me decide upfront that I was so not interested in this firm. But since I had been called, I waited. It’d be interesting to see how I could contribute there, considering that I am not from the IT line.

Finally I was called in. The man who interviewed me was very good looking. In fact, I couldn’t help but stared at his face. He looked so fresh. Then I found out that if I were to join the firm, I would be reporting to him. Hhmm… interesting. He asked me to talk about myself. Then he went through my CV. He noticed that I was from PPP/ITM. He confessed that he also did his A-Levels there, before he went to the UK to do his degree. So, he is my super senior. Interesting.

He also talked about the job. I would not be doing any IT-related scope but more towards Strategy-related services and Policy making. The division works closely with government agencies and bodies, and provides innovative solutions to these entities in whichever capacity that leads to the betterment of these entities. They are involved in various industries and always work hand-in-hand with their clients. Of course if late night is required in order to finish a proposal, then everyone has to stay in and finish the work. There was a time whereby they worked through the night up till the next morning just to get a proposal out. I told them that I am ok to work late, but I have never worked until the next day. The minute he mentioned that, the first thing that cropped in my head is my kids, especially the breastfeeding one. Hhmm…

Because he had a meeting to attend to, I was only interviewed for about half an hour. After that, I left.

The weeks after that, I didn’t get a call back. I was alright with it. I wasn’t eager to leave the company that I am working for at the moment anyway, but if I do get an offer based on the salary figure that I put in the CV, then I may have to rethink the whole thing.

Exactly three weeks after the interview, I received a call. They want me. In fact, they are willing to let me have my bonus and whatever increment I’m supposed to get here before they make an offer. So that’s like another month. I am happy to know that they’re quite considerate on that. But now, it boils back to whether I want to accept it or not. And that is a very big question at the moment, because I do not know how to answer it. Should I go or should I not go.

I have asked the opinions of several friends. And most of them asked me to weigh the pros and cons, especially in terms of benefits and EPF contribution. I have to admit that the benefits I receive at the moment are very comforting. When I asked the firm on the sort of benefits that I may get, they weren’t very clear on that. So the next step is to know the details of the benefits I may get, and of course the salary structure. These two important things are quite crucial in determining whether I ought to accept the offer. They also asked me to use my intuition as there is already an answer there, except that I may have to dig it to find out. And of course, the non-financial aspects of it. Hhmm… very tough.

So now, I am still weighing it. It would have been much easier if my kids are all grown up. Then I can pretty much do anything. But my prime concern is the kids. I have never left them overnight. If I have a meeting outside (even in Singapore), I would ensure that I come back the same day. I’m not that worried about Marsya as she’s a big girl now (yeah I know she’s just three) but Raqib still breastfeeds and I can’t imagine leaving him not breastfed for even a single night. I remember a dear friend who encountered similar problems about 2 and a half years ago, and when she got back from outstation, her daughter merajuk with her. Hhmm.. difficult lah kan.

But I still have a month to go. The prospect of doing something entirely different is exciting. But staying here is comforting (which isn’t good, I suppose). Hhhmmm...