Getting Heavier By The Day

I went for my check up yesterday. I am basically reaching 31 weeks, that’s like another a week and a half for my pregnancy to be 8 months. The first thing I learnt upon my visit with the doctor yesterday was that I had gained 3 kilos. And only within 3 weeks! I mean, what is that?! I have grown fat. In fact, I am getting fatter by the day. I admit that my appetite is now back to normal, and not that I eat a lot of sweets and chocolates, but I cannot resist a mug of black coffee (preferably Nesacafe O) everyday after lunch. Another thing which I cannot resist is ice-cream Nestle Crunchie. I just love Crunchie. Vanilla ice-cream on a stick with peanut chocolate coating and chocolate stick in the middle; love it!! No wonder I have gained 3 kilos, right. I am now officially 66.6 kg. How about that for being fat. I know I shouldn’t complain. Even when I lost a lot of weight, I complained, and now that I am well and gaining weight, I also complain. Humans are never happy with what they have. It shouldn’t be the way. I am still working on that. But.. that’s just it. Oh well..

Anway, people around me have been telling me that from the shape of my bulging tummy, it seems that I might be getting a boy. I know. I have many non-medical experts around me. All of them wanted to tell me their ‘medical’ and expert views on what the gender of a baby is just by looking at the tummy. Well, for the third time when I saw my doctor, she confirmed again that she saw a ‘burger’ i.e. the baby’s a girl. I bet she’s probably tired of having to listen to me pester on the gender whenever she does the scanning. I can’t help it. I wanted to be sure. So sure enough yesterday, she confirmed it again for me that I am going to be having a girl. I’m happy, alright. But then I suppose, I just have to wait for the baby to come out to confirm whether it is a girl or a boy. Either way, I am fine. As long as the baby is healthy, perfect in terms of physical and mental health and not too big, so that I wouldn’t have problem pushing it out from my you-know-where during labour, then I am happy already. A big baby proves to be quite difficult to push out. I know. My boy weighed 3.8 kg when he was born 3 years ago. And I had complications after that, and I seriously do not want to go through all that again. It was a very painful experience.

At the moment, the baby weighs 1.7 kg. It seems to be in perfect health. I saw its face yesterday. But because there were so many umbilical cords in front of its face, I didn’t really know what to make out what the face actually looks like. Bie could see it clearly though. Maybe because I was in a lying position which resulted in me not really seeing the face. Well, whatever it is, Bie said it has button nose just like its siblings. I thought that was reassuring. I have a button nose. Bie’s is bigger and rounder. So, if suddenly it has a sharper bridged nose, I think I’d worry.

So yeah, the check up went alright yesterday. But because I was sick the day before, I asked for my doctor to prescribe me with some cough syrup and sore throat medicine. You see, I have been having a terrible sore throat since last Friday, that’s about 4, 5 days ago. But I didn’t want to visit my normal GP because being pregnant and all, I prefer to see my doctor. But on the Monday, I was in pain, on top of the sore throat and coughing. My tummy seems to be weighing down on me. I guess it was because I was tired. I went for a picnic in PD the day before. I slept late on the Saturday, preparing the foods and the things which needed to be brought for the picnic. I cooked Sambal Ikan Bilis, sardine for the sandwich, and prepared the ingredients for Bihun Goreng. On Sunday, I woke up early to fry the bihun, eggs and chicken drummets (non-spicy as well as the spicy ones). My sister-in-law prepared the sandwiches whilst Ibu cooked the Nasi Lemak. We were supposed to leave at 7.30am, but after getting things prepared and all, we only left at 9.00am. Upon reaching PD, after enjoying the spread of food, I took my two kids for a dip in the sea. I didn’t want to acknowledge the fact that I might get tired or anything, because I wanted my kids to enjoy the sea. But later in the evening, I was experiencing sharp pains at the bottom of my tummy. The fact that I had trouble engaging in ‘business no. 2’, didn’t help (toilet issues lah…). Ibu was worried. She said the baby seems to have engaged and that my tummy was really low. She was afraid that I was going into labour. I reassured her and told her no coz based on my experience; I always deliver near my due dates. She wasn’t convinced. But the sharp pains were becoming unbearable. So that’s why I decided not to go to work on Monday and rested at home instead. Luckily my check up was the next day (the Tuesday).

As it turns out, my doctor confirmed that the baby’s already engaged. Its head is already in position as where it should be if I’m to go into labour and the pains that I felt at the bottom of my tummy could be because of that. So yeah, that’s why my tummy seems to be on the low side. The baby is no longer at the top. It is now already at the bottom. I must admit, I think it’s quite fast. After all, I have another 2 months to go before my due date. Oh well, remains to be seen. Only Allah knows when it will actually comes out, and I hope it’ll come out as it gets nearer to my due date, Insya Allah.

So yeah, I am getting heavier by the day. My tummy is pushing me down and my weight is gaining fast. But I try not to dwell on it so much. I don’t want to pamper my body. So I still take the LRT to go home from work, or get to work, depending on the situation, and do house chores as well as cook whenever necessary. I don’t believe in pampering my body too much. Of course I try not to overwork my body; the PD experience taught me that. But if the boss asks me to go to Johor for a site visit, I don’t think I’ll say no. Work is work after all. I don’t want my boss to think that just because I’m pregnant, I can’t undertake site visits or do any other work. After all, I have to prove myself as reliable, pregnant or not. That’s life especially in a corporate world where the number of men outweighs the number of women, at least at my company. You just have to work twice as hard just to show that you are at par with your male colleagues. It’s kind of pathetic, I know, but that’s just life here. And that’s another story, another time.

Irritated By Someone

How do you get over an irritation that is caused by someone who has no idea that he is actually irritating you? I am having that problem now. It’s no one really and it is purely work-related. I really want to show my professionalism around him, and I think I have, but deep inside I know that I am giving him a hard time.

Whenever he approaches my cubicle and asked, “So is there anything that I can do for you? Any work?”, I get irritated because, it’s not like I have never given him work before. My first experience with him when it comes to work was not actually good. He’s this young executive who has just joined the department. But he will not be here for long. He’s on an attachment basis, if you can call it that, and he will rotate within the group company every six months or so. So, he is not very focused nor is he committed. Whenever I give him something to do, yes he’ll do it, but then he would tell me that he has got to see his mentor, or that he has a seminar which finishes after 5pm and will not come back to the office, or that he’ll not be around for the next 4 or 5 days because he has to attend some workshops in relation to his young executive scheme project. I mean, come on. How am I supposed to have the confidence in you whenever I give you things to do, you just can’t seem to deliver? Yes no doubt you have other important things to do, but the work I give you is equally important. End up; I have to do it myself.

What makes me mad is that my boss asked me to give him more work because he has to rate him by the end of the day, and how is he going to rate him if all he does is do the photocopying or binding? Fine.. but this young bloke’s failure to deliver will be at my expense. My reputation. I hate that. There is another executive in the department. Fairly new as well, but somehow he can do work. He’s unlike the other bloke. And I find him quite reliable. But my boss has asked me to stop using him because it seems, others in the department are also using him to their benefits. Work-wise of course. I mean, why am I the one that has to compromise.

So these days, whenever he asks me for more tasks, I can’t seem to be nice about it. My head would be talking inside saying things like, “Yeah.. err.. I seriously do not know what to give you because I find you irritating”. I can’t say that, can I? How do I get over the irritation? Because of this, I find other things he does annoying as well. It’s not very professional of me, I know that, but he has done a little mistake. And first impression really does count.

At the moment, I am asking him to send out the survey forms to all our financial stakeholders. So far so good, but he keeps on referring to me even on the littlest of things. Do it yourself, first. If you don’t know, then let me know. Don’t expect me to spoonfeed you all the time. Penatlah macam ni. I thought you wanted to be Manager-material… [sigh].. it’s just so tiring thinking about it. I don’t want us to have problems, but whenever he starts asking me whether I have jobs to give him, it ticks me. Stop asking me..!! I’ll give stuff for you to do if you stop harassing me with that question. It can be very tiring you know. And imagine, I have to put up with this for the next two months. I wonder whether others are also having similar prolems.