Have Two of Them Now

I have been extremely busy. For those who do not know, I have returned to work from my two-month maternity leave. It’s actually very short. At first I felt that the two months was going to be long. But after I got better, I felt that the two months were just too short. There were still a lot of things I haven’t done yet. I had wanted to take an extra week off, but my boss was constantly calling me, so I had no choice but to come in right on my 61st day.

I wanted to update the blog with stories and pictures of my new baby. His name is Muhammad Raqib. But since I didn’t have the time, I couldn’t draft anything. Only some of his pictures are uploaded into my PC. Bie unfortunately has been quite busy and not at the office to do the uploading of the pictures. Nevertheless, Raqib is now 6kg. Well, I assume he’s already 6kg because during the doctor’s appointment about three weeks ago, he was already 5.9kg. That’s like 1kg every month. I’m still breastfeeding him. I have been expressing milk at the work place and Alhamdullilah, as at to date, my milk seems to be sufficient. I hope it’ll be sufficient in months to come.

Raqib is just so adorable (I’m biased coz I’m his mother) and he likes attention. He wants people to constantly talk to him. He would of course respond in his own baby-ish ways. The goo-goo and ga-ga that come from his mouth is just so ear-pleasing. I can talk to him all day. But of course, I can’t do much work then. He still has this baby smell. Frankly speaking, I don’t know this smell that people talk about. All I can smell of him is milk. My milk that is. It can be in a form of a fresh milk, or stale milk, or thrown up milk. But I love his smell all the same.

He likes to smile and I love seeing his teeth-less gums. Gums with no teeth looks so cute in a baby’s mouth, but I wonder why people, when they’ve come of age and are suddenly toothless looks really ridiculous. The mystery of the world.

Anyhow, his sister adores him very much. But she can be very jealous and possessive. Yes she wouldn’t allow other people to take her little brother (the usual, “Aunty ambik adik bawak balik boleh tak?” whereby the reply would be, “tak bolehlah”), but whenever Raqib is not lying on my lap, she would immediately scramble to her feet and climb into my lap. There were also times whereby she wanted to sleep with me but because I needed to put the baby to sleep, she became all tantrums and cried herself to sleep. On those occasions, the minute Raqib is asleep, I would go to Marsya and sleep next to her. She would be very happy. She would hug me while sleeping or read some books for me (in her own toddler language) until she fell asleep.

But she loves to whine these days. Sakit tulah, sakit nilah. And she wants me to attend to her ‘sakit’. If her father does it for her, she’d get all mad and will not stop whining until I personally look at her. I don’t blame her though. So used to being the only one that everyone pays attention to and suddenly her place is being taken over by her little brother, of course she whines and merajuk a lot. Sometimes, her constant craving for attention is just so much that Bie and I become very tired. But she is after all our eldest, so despite her constant screaming and whining, we love her still very much and try to please her in any way we can, just so that she’ll be alright during this adjustment period.

I too have some adjustments to do. Let’s just say that when both my kids cry at the top of their lungs, I have learnt to shut one ear and be deaf for a while, well at least until I finish whatever it is that I have to do. But my God, it is very hard to do. I respect those women who have more than two kids and yet are able to take care of them and do the house chores without a maid at their disposal. 110 percent respect for them.

Whatever it is, I love both my kids very much. And truthfully, I don’t mind having more, but not just as yet. Perhaps three years down the road, who knows. Anyhow, here are some pictures of Raqib.