We don’t know the extent of a mother’s love for us, until we ourselves become mothers. That’s what I feel. We take for granted the love that our mothers shower us, thinking that it’s their forte coz after all, isn’t that what mothers are supposed to do. But sometimes we ourselves as children failed to reciprocate the love that our mothers give us. We think by giving them money or calling them to say hi, is enough to show that we love them, but believe me, those are just basically the tip of the iceberg. There is actually more to it than that. But of course, we failed to see that.
There are many types of mothers out there. There’s one who doesn’t talk much but is always taking crap (pardon my language) from other people. There are the possessive ones, the gossipy ones, the ones who can’t seem to stop talking about their children, the competitive ones, the pushy ones, the irritating ones, the ones who are overly protective, and the list goes on and on.
And we, sometimes as children, despised our mothers when they’re at their worst. We refuse to understand them and are always looking at the negative side of things. We sometimes treat our mothers with disrespect (when we’re angry about something) and always assume that our mothers are ok with it. Just give her a few days to cool off. But it doesn’t work that way.
A mother’s love for her children is actually indescribable. Do you really think that the lady who killed her two young sons because she was upset with her husband do not love her children? I feel that she loved her children very much, but her temporary insanity at that time together with bad judgment, influenced her decision to carry out the terrible deed. Who are we, the people who do not know her, comment on her or judge her? Although our hearts reached out for the boys and we were dismayed at the fact that the mother could actually kill her two kids, only Allah knows why it happened. Things happen for a reason and what better being to understand other than Allah himself.
I had an hour long conversation with Ibu yesterday and some of the things she touched upon made me have tears in my eyes. Lately, I feel that Ibu has drifted away from me. She’s busy with her personal things and I have to admit that though I’m married and all, I do feel neglected. I am always in contact with Ayah (he calls me like nearly everyday – what to do, I’m a Daddy’s girl), but Ibu… well, she’s not they type to call for unnecessary reason. She is also not the type that remembers important dates and all.
But yesterday, she made me open my eyes on what a mother’s love truly means. Though we’re all big children, but in her eyes, we’re still small. She gets hurt twice as fast if anything were to happen to us or if any of us is sad with grief. She cited one very good example; she’d rather be bitten by the mosquito rather than to see her children sleep restlessly at night. That caught me by surprise. Because of the hot weather these days, there seemed to be a lot of mosquitoes at night. I just don’t know where they come from. And I would actually stay awake just to ensure that the mosquitoes do not bite my daughter. I hate seeing her scratching here and there when she’s asleep. And when she does scratch, I would always wake up to put some lotion or ointment on the places that she was bit, whatever time that may be. So when Ibu said that, I felt emotional. Tears were welling up in my eyes, but I controlled them.
She said, “I love my children very much. There is no way for me to describe the feelings. I may not show them through tasty cooking or shower them with gifts and presents, but believe me when I say that I love each and every one of you. In my eyes, you are still very small. I am tired of crying, and I don’t want to simply cry if my child upsets me. I don’t want you to be sinned for every tear that dropped because believe me, I don’t want that for my children. But I sometimes wish that my children would understand me. You’re a mother now. I’m sure you know how much a mother loves her child”.
So from today onwards, I vow to accept her views and understand her actions. I will try to be more supportive and be her shoulder to cry on or let out any frustration when she needs it. I will also try to bite my tongue and not answer her back or comment negatively when she is telling me certain things (if I do comment, I would have to ensure that the comments will not hurt her). She is after all my mother and I want her to know that I will love her to the max until the day that Allah calls her to meet Him.
There are many types of mothers out there. There’s one who doesn’t talk much but is always taking crap (pardon my language) from other people. There are the possessive ones, the gossipy ones, the ones who can’t seem to stop talking about their children, the competitive ones, the pushy ones, the irritating ones, the ones who are overly protective, and the list goes on and on.
And we, sometimes as children, despised our mothers when they’re at their worst. We refuse to understand them and are always looking at the negative side of things. We sometimes treat our mothers with disrespect (when we’re angry about something) and always assume that our mothers are ok with it. Just give her a few days to cool off. But it doesn’t work that way.
A mother’s love for her children is actually indescribable. Do you really think that the lady who killed her two young sons because she was upset with her husband do not love her children? I feel that she loved her children very much, but her temporary insanity at that time together with bad judgment, influenced her decision to carry out the terrible deed. Who are we, the people who do not know her, comment on her or judge her? Although our hearts reached out for the boys and we were dismayed at the fact that the mother could actually kill her two kids, only Allah knows why it happened. Things happen for a reason and what better being to understand other than Allah himself.
I had an hour long conversation with Ibu yesterday and some of the things she touched upon made me have tears in my eyes. Lately, I feel that Ibu has drifted away from me. She’s busy with her personal things and I have to admit that though I’m married and all, I do feel neglected. I am always in contact with Ayah (he calls me like nearly everyday – what to do, I’m a Daddy’s girl), but Ibu… well, she’s not they type to call for unnecessary reason. She is also not the type that remembers important dates and all.
But yesterday, she made me open my eyes on what a mother’s love truly means. Though we’re all big children, but in her eyes, we’re still small. She gets hurt twice as fast if anything were to happen to us or if any of us is sad with grief. She cited one very good example; she’d rather be bitten by the mosquito rather than to see her children sleep restlessly at night. That caught me by surprise. Because of the hot weather these days, there seemed to be a lot of mosquitoes at night. I just don’t know where they come from. And I would actually stay awake just to ensure that the mosquitoes do not bite my daughter. I hate seeing her scratching here and there when she’s asleep. And when she does scratch, I would always wake up to put some lotion or ointment on the places that she was bit, whatever time that may be. So when Ibu said that, I felt emotional. Tears were welling up in my eyes, but I controlled them.
She said, “I love my children very much. There is no way for me to describe the feelings. I may not show them through tasty cooking or shower them with gifts and presents, but believe me when I say that I love each and every one of you. In my eyes, you are still very small. I am tired of crying, and I don’t want to simply cry if my child upsets me. I don’t want you to be sinned for every tear that dropped because believe me, I don’t want that for my children. But I sometimes wish that my children would understand me. You’re a mother now. I’m sure you know how much a mother loves her child”.
So from today onwards, I vow to accept her views and understand her actions. I will try to be more supportive and be her shoulder to cry on or let out any frustration when she needs it. I will also try to bite my tongue and not answer her back or comment negatively when she is telling me certain things (if I do comment, I would have to ensure that the comments will not hurt her). She is after all my mother and I want her to know that I will love her to the max until the day that Allah calls her to meet Him.
2 comments:
It is in human nature that one's bad deed (despite how harmless it can be) can wash away all other good deeds and make him/her a bad person.
The same applies to mothers and fathers. Sometimes all it takes for them to be despised by their children is one simple and honest mistake, and their children can hate them forever. Sadly, these children fail to see and appreciate all those other sacrifices and good deeds that their parents have given them all the while.
This is also one of the reasons why married couples get divorced. They concentrate so much on the bad things, despite probably knowing the number of good memories they have together way outnumber the bad ones.
Thanks for your thoughts. And I have to agree with you that we see the bad deeds first over the good ones.
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