Last Friday night, I came back from work late. I had a management paper to do and it had been long pending. When I reached Mak Su’s house, she was with Wan. Apparently Wan was experiencing labour pain. Her contraction periods were getting shorter and her face was red as she was trying to cope with the pain. It reminded me of the time when I was about to introduce Marsya to the face of the earth. It was scary and I could feel her pain. I mean, who came up with the statement, “…masuk anak nombor dua nanti, lupa dah sakit nak beranak”. Hello..!! The pain is fresh in my head, ok. Anyway, Mak Su was to accompany Wan to the University Hospital. So the clothes were packed and Wan sat on the sofa, her face all red. We could hardly hear her voice.
Then it dawned on me: Marsya will no longer be the apple of everyone’s eyes…
It saddened me. Mak Su will be baby-sitting the new baby when Wan gets back to work after her confinement period. Marsya will no longer be the baby of the house. She will be replaced with the new baby. My poor baby…
I told Bie and he told me not to be upset. He said, “Kalau yang lain dah tak manjakan dia, kita still manjakan dia. Apa you nak risau? Abi and Umi dia kan ada”. In a way he was right. But I can’t help feeling that Marsya will not be taken care of dengan penuh kasih saying. I think I’ve gone bonkers. Whatever it is, Marsya is still Mak Su’s granddaughter and NOTHING can take that away from her, not even the new baby. Besides, the new baby will not be doing much. After all, she’s still a baby. Marsya is a year plus and is at that particular age where everybody likes to kacau just to see her laugh or cry. Ok, this is me, trying to make sense of the whole thing. Trying to accept that Marsya will no longer be the baby of the house.
I guess I’m feeling this way because right now, in my life, Marsya is the apple of MY eye. Since she doesn’t have any brother or sister, she will continue to be the apple of our eyes (our being me and Bie).
Oh well, who am I to prevent Mak Su from taking up new babies. Even if Mak Su doesn’t want to take care of any new baby, she can’t refuse Wan. Wan’s eldest boy was taken care by Mak Su when he was a baby. So it’s only natural that the new baby be taken care of Mak Su as well. I mean, Mak Su is just the type of woman that every mother looks for in a baby-sitter. She is compassionate, fun, caring and loving. That’s why most mothers send their babies to Mak Su’s, including me. Coupled with a caring husband like Pak Su, NO ONE can resist NOT sending their children to Mak Su’s and Pak Su’s.
Anyway, Wan delivered a beautiful baby girl on early Saturday morning. She named her Wan Najwa. Mak Su said she’s very fair. And weighs about 2.72 kg, which I think is all right considering Wan’s VERY small sized tummy when she was pregnant. In a way, I can’t wait to see the new baby as well. I haven’t bought the baby any gift. I think I prefer to give the new baby some ‘ang-pow’. I think that worth a lot more than any baby gift since she already has an older brother, whose toys are pretty much just lying around.
Well Marsya, looks like you have to compromise with Najwa. You see, Marsya is also very ‘manja’ with Najwa’s father. “Pantang nampak Mi, menggapai jer tangan suruh angkat”. Anyhow, having Najwa around is probably a positive thing. It’ll help Marsya (and me) to deal with the probability of having a new baby in the future.
Then it dawned on me: Marsya will no longer be the apple of everyone’s eyes…
It saddened me. Mak Su will be baby-sitting the new baby when Wan gets back to work after her confinement period. Marsya will no longer be the baby of the house. She will be replaced with the new baby. My poor baby…
I told Bie and he told me not to be upset. He said, “Kalau yang lain dah tak manjakan dia, kita still manjakan dia. Apa you nak risau? Abi and Umi dia kan ada”. In a way he was right. But I can’t help feeling that Marsya will not be taken care of dengan penuh kasih saying. I think I’ve gone bonkers. Whatever it is, Marsya is still Mak Su’s granddaughter and NOTHING can take that away from her, not even the new baby. Besides, the new baby will not be doing much. After all, she’s still a baby. Marsya is a year plus and is at that particular age where everybody likes to kacau just to see her laugh or cry. Ok, this is me, trying to make sense of the whole thing. Trying to accept that Marsya will no longer be the baby of the house.
I guess I’m feeling this way because right now, in my life, Marsya is the apple of MY eye. Since she doesn’t have any brother or sister, she will continue to be the apple of our eyes (our being me and Bie).
Oh well, who am I to prevent Mak Su from taking up new babies. Even if Mak Su doesn’t want to take care of any new baby, she can’t refuse Wan. Wan’s eldest boy was taken care by Mak Su when he was a baby. So it’s only natural that the new baby be taken care of Mak Su as well. I mean, Mak Su is just the type of woman that every mother looks for in a baby-sitter. She is compassionate, fun, caring and loving. That’s why most mothers send their babies to Mak Su’s, including me. Coupled with a caring husband like Pak Su, NO ONE can resist NOT sending their children to Mak Su’s and Pak Su’s.
Anyway, Wan delivered a beautiful baby girl on early Saturday morning. She named her Wan Najwa. Mak Su said she’s very fair. And weighs about 2.72 kg, which I think is all right considering Wan’s VERY small sized tummy when she was pregnant. In a way, I can’t wait to see the new baby as well. I haven’t bought the baby any gift. I think I prefer to give the new baby some ‘ang-pow’. I think that worth a lot more than any baby gift since she already has an older brother, whose toys are pretty much just lying around.
Well Marsya, looks like you have to compromise with Najwa. You see, Marsya is also very ‘manja’ with Najwa’s father. “Pantang nampak Mi, menggapai jer tangan suruh angkat”. Anyhow, having Najwa around is probably a positive thing. It’ll help Marsya (and me) to deal with the probability of having a new baby in the future.
2 comments:
alaa, mas, now i think ur being selfish. c'mon, it doesn't mean that when there's another baby in the house, marsya will be put aside. kalau dah sayang, sayang la. marsya is not a thing, tapi just another person, same goes with you and your brothers, did your parents love all of you differently? actually what you are thinking or expecting is what i'm experiencing but with the tables turned. bf my baby's born, my mother kept repeating that she's going to take care of all her grandchildren, but now, who's taking care of whose baby? what do you think how i felt?i felt betrayed by my own mother and bitter about the whole thing. at last she said to me that she really want to take care of my baby but there was nobody to take her to my place. what lame excuse is that? she can come to my place if she really wanted to. but then she said that if she did that, then who's going to take care of the first baby. actually its more than that, everybody had their own agendas. who would want to "release" a ready and willing baby sitter cum cook?and "cheap" some more. the reason i kept saying to my self is that my place will be cramp and it will inconvenience my parents as they are used to a more spacious home, and i'm not exactly on good terms with my father.
so in the end, at the last minute (how to find a reliable baby sitter at the last minute?luckily my ipar found one near their place) i have to send my baby to a babysitter which is in the end its better coz i dont have to submit to more self pitying and i can make my own decision on how to raise my child without anybody's "instructions". sometimes, i felt very merajuk sampai tak nak let my baby with them.luckily, hubby was really undrstanding & rajin pujuk. now, i try to look at the positive side. so when you wrote what u wrote, well it just ticked me off.
i remember once you said (while i was still heavily prgnant) suruh my sister cari baby sitter lain la, since that anak dia dah besar compared to mine. well, mas sekarang ko plak yang rasa insecure.
i think u are lucky to have darah daging yang jaga marsya. so jgn paranoid sangat la. another baby is good for marsya, dia akan ada kawan sebaya utk main.org dewasa tak sama cam rakan sebaya.
one more thing, if & when u see my family never ever say a word about what i wrote tau.take care.
Friend..
Thanks dear. I guess it's stupid of me to feel insecure AND judging from your experience, you have A LOT more rasa tak puas hati compared to me. I was just being selfish (very true..) but I'm willing to put that aside lah because I am lucky that Mak Su is taking care of Marsya. And so far (for actual fact lah), I never see her lebih-lebihkan all the babies that she takes care of. So far lah. It's just me lah, Friend. Aku yang terasa insecure tak tentu pasal. And you're right, rakan sebaya has been very good for Marsya. And I should actually take that positively.
But as for you... hhmm.. I don't know what to say lah. And now that your sister is pregnant with the second one, your mom sah2 will stay with her. Don't worry about it lah. What's important is that your daughter is in good hands. No doubt that she's not being taken care of her own grandmother.. that one, you'd know better lah. BUT, I'm sure her baby-sitter here loves her to the max. Don't worry ok.
Sorry to hear about your pains and merajuk when it comes to this. If hubby tak cukup nak dengar luahan kau, you'll always have me if you want to let off some steam. Just give me a call, and I'll go there.
By the way, glad to know that you took the time to visit my blog. Thanks. Hope to see more of you next time.
Take care, Friend.
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